Often the labels that manufacturers place on their goods say something like “to insure the best results possible, follow the instructions of the manufacturers carefully”
If this is good advice for the use of the things which are made by man, it ought to be even better advice for taking care of the things which have been made by God.
Marriage is just such a thing !
Read carefully Ephesians 5:22–33, Wives, submit to your husbands as to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, His body, of which He is the Savior. Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything. Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave Himself up for her to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, and to present her to Himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. After all, no one ever hated his own body, but he feeds and cares for it, just as Christ does the church – for we are members of His body. For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh. This is a profound mystery – but I am talking about Christ and the church. However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband. Also read 1st Peter 3:1–7, Wives, in the same way be submissive to your husbands so that, if any of them do not believe the word, they may be won over without words by the behavior of their wives, when they see the purity and reverence of your lives. Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as braided hair and the wearing of gold jewelry and fine clothes. Instead, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight. For this is the way the holy women of the past who put their hope in God used to make themselves beautiful. They were submissive to their own husbands, like Sarah, who obeyed Abraham and called him her master. You are her daughters if you do what is right and do not give way to fear. Husbands, in the same way be considerate as you live with your wives, and treat them with respect as the weaker partner and as heirs with you of the gracious gift of life, so that nothing will hinder your prayers.
When a couple gets married, there are more adjustments than are immediately obvious. Each person must give up some independence and must consider the needs and wishes of another person in making decisions.
Relationships with each other’s friends and family also require both persons to adjust.
When two become three, further adjustments are required. Although these can be difficult or sometimes disturbing, patience and caring do increase the love and joy in the home and do ease the problems of coping.
Some people who have been married for years claim they have never had a quarrel. This is unlikely. No two people think and act exactly alike.
Submission of a wife is not the same as slavery. The difference between slavery and submission is important. A slave is forced to do her work, she is under obligation. A submissive wife, on the other hand does things willingly in obedient to the will of God, as in 1st Peter 3:1–7.
Most men are in complete agreement with God’s directions to their wives, they like the idea of their wives being submissive to them, but at the same time they ignore or even reject God’s plan for the husband as it is given in 1st Corinthians 11:3, Now I want you to realize that the head of every man is Christ, and the head of the woman is man, and the head of Christ is God.
God’s complete plan for marriage requires submission from partner in the marriage. See Ephesians 5:25–31, Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave Himself up for her to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, and to present her to Himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. After all, no one ever hated his own body, but he feeds and cares for it, just as Christ does the church – for we are members of His body. For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.
Jesus did not think about Himself when He gave Himself up for the church. What love! This kind of love is not measured by feelings alone, nor by what is given directly. It is measured by the sacrifice that is paid.
Husbands are to show their submission by loving their wives. In a good marriage both partners should be able to express themselves, either rationally or sometimes, emotionally. Each person should further be able to admit making a mistake and say, “I am sorry” It is n’t the disagreement so much or how it develops that is important, but how it is settled.
May the spirit of the true love abide in us in Jesus ‘name.